THE KRSNA BHAKTA

While under training in Delhi, we had to go in groups to factories producing different types of materials in the states of Delhi. Punjab, Harayana and Uttar Pradesh for practical training .

During these tours, we also had opportunities to visit places of tourist interest. During one such tour, I was fortunate enough to visit Kuruksetra. The Birla Mandir is located on the bank of the holy Kuruksetra tank. In front, there is a hand pump, with sweet, cool water. We reached there by two in the afternoon, much oppressed by the summer heat. After washing our hands, feet and face in that cool water, we felt somewhat relaxed and regained our happy and joyful mood. On the left of this temple there is a mighty carved chariot with four full sized horses. On the chariot are seated Krsna as the driver, and Arjuna with his famous Gandiva bow. The chariot, horses Arjuna and Krsna have been carved of one huge rock of marble.

Inside the temple, the image of Shri Krishna is worshipped and the walls are inscribed with all the verses of the Giita.

All these things are extremely beautiful and the whole surroundings are very attracting.

The trainees were looking at the beauties of the temple in different groups. Some people began to worship the image of Krsna in the temple. I was reading the verses inscribed on the walls and was looking at the paintings and pictures. I suddenly noticed that a dark complexioned gentleman of middle age who appeared to be a farmer by his dress and demeanour, was trying to decipher something on the wall. He had only a dhoti on and his upper body was bare. In order to see what he was reading I stopped behind him for a moment. Seeing me standing there, he looked at me with tearful eyes and asked me to read out what was written there on that line for him. It said, “In whichever form they worship Me, I appear to them in that very form.” As I read out this line, he began to cry loudly, “Krsna Krsna!”

I said, “It is not necessary to call like this. Will He hear only your loud cries? If you have to make Him hear, then you have to call Him from the bottom of your heart. He has to be called only in the way in which He has taught us to call Him. He understands the language of the heart only.”

As I said this he embraced me and began to cry loudly, “Krsna! Krsna!” I remembered Baba mentally and asked what I should do. Seeing that man embracing me, other trainees, rushed towards me and tried to pull him away. One of the trainees who was a Muslim from Bihar told our friends not to disturb us, as it appeared that both of us belonged to the same sect. When my trainee friends moved a little away from me that gentleman asked me how he would be able to meet Krsna. All my friends took him to be mad and began to watch that no harm came to me. That person was full of devotion. He lost consciousness of his body and mind and continued to insist again and again that I should help him to meet Krsna.I was wondering mentally whether another Bindeshwariji has appeared before me in another form!

This person was also adamant like Bindeshwariji of Jamalpur. Has Baba ordained that I should always serve this type of personality?

Time and place were not favorable to explain the practical side of meditation. Therefore, I prayed to Baba in my mind that He should rescue me from this situation. It took a lot of time to console and explain things to that gentleman. I could not see much of the place and temple. Meanwhile the other trainees and the Principal boarded the bus and began to wait for me. But this gentleman was not prepared to leave me. He came with me up to the bus and asked me to show him the way to meet Krsna. I again thought of Baba and told that man, “Repeat His name from the bottom of your heart. How can Krsna help but to meet you, if while waking, sleeping, sitting rising, or walking you should continue to repeat His name? This will certainly work.” As I said this, he let me go and saw me off with a heavy heart. He continued to look at my bus until it was out of sight. I do not know who in the form of this devotee was sent to me. Great and strange is Baba’s liila. I continued to recall that devoted man throughout my trip and so also I thought of Baba again and again. This trip was thus highly enjoyable. That man’s devotion and keenness to meet Krsna was so great that Baba must have certainly showed Himself to him in some form or other. This is my firm belief. I was fortunate in having another singular trip to Mathura. It was the time of swing festival. Devotees would place the idol of Krsna on a swing or jhula and would give him gentle swings. Although Mathura is the birthplace of Krsna yet in visiting the sites of this place, I did not feel any special vibrations. This was most surprising. I inquired from Pandas there about that prison where Krsna was born. One of he Pandas took me to a place that according to him was the birthplace of Krsna. I stayed there for some time and thought of Krsna, but felt no vibration at all. Consequently I returned rather disappointed from there. Afterwards when I was seated at Baba’s feet in Jamalpur, I referred to my experiences in Mathura. Baba pointed out, “All places connected with the birth of Krsna are now-a-days under the Yamuna River. Therefore you did not feel the vibrations there.” Now I understood why the holy place of Krsna’s birth became tasteless for me. Baba further pointed out that there are some places connected with Krsna in Gokul and Vrindavan.

I AM TEMPTED TO SMOKE During training I used to see everyone smoking and this gave birth to my desire to start smoking again. Although after the punishment Baba had given me I had given up smoking, but this desire began to grow in this company. The more I tried to suppress this desire, the stronger it became. This continued for days until I began to feel that now it would not be possible to suppress it any longer. Whenever this desire became strong, I would always remember and pray to Baba that he may protect my helpless self from resuming smoking. But all my prayers failed. Many a time I thought that I should buy cigarettes and stealthily smoke but again I realised that once I began this habit will never die. I had given it up only afterpunishment from Baba on this score Many arguments for and against would come to my mind in regard to smoking but all arguments appeared to fail before the strength of my desire. Sometimes when I saw someone smoking a cigarette, I felt like borrowing one from him to smoke. But my shyness prevented my from doing so. After continuous suppression of this desire, extremely ugly ideas began to creep in my mind. I felt like picking up a stub and smoking it. These thoughts filled me with self-loathing and condemnation. In spite of such severe struggle in the mind, it appeared that some power was creating the right type of ideas and arguments in my mind to enable me to withstand my rising powerful desire. One day I went to the extent of asking for a cigarette from one of my friends from Bihar. He was a devout Muslim, but he used to smoke. He knew the circumstances under which I had given up smoking, and so he asked what I would do with a cigarette. I said I would smoke.

He looked at me in surprise and said, “ What are you saying?” I told him that I was serious about starting smoking again. He now began to plead, “You have given up smoking as a result of a vow taken by you after your guru punished you. How then are you thinking like this? Please try to keep your vow.”

In spite of my insistent request he did not give me a cigarette. Now I began to keep all my money with him so that I could not buy cigarettes. Whenever I asked for money from him, in a very gentle and cultured way he would first ascertain my needs and would supply me with these things immediately. But he never allowed me to handle cash. Now he became extra cautious that I might not buy and smoke cigarettes. He became so alert that he informed other trainees also that I should never smoke. Many times I tried to buy cigarettes but every time some unknown power created some obstacle and I had to give up my plans. One day oppressed by intense desires I beseeched Baba that He may kindly help me from descending into hell again. Baba miraculously graced me and the desire to smoke ended forever. After a lot of mental clash I realised that on the one hand Baba was aggravating my desire like a homeopathic medicine dose and on the other hand He was the unseen person who helped me to overcome my temptation. Not only this, He had inspired my companion to watch me cautiously and through this medium was reminding me of my vow and was again educating me in this regard. Great is the liila of the Lord and great are His ways of saving His disciples from a fall. Now and then I remember these graces of Baba and remain absorbed in His thought for hours. My prayer is, “Oh Lord, protect me like this always and whenever I stagger or fall, support me to get up and walk again.”

Salutations to Baba the First Vibrational Principle Who Is Highly Respectable

POSTING TO HAJIPUR While under training in Delhi I received orders that I stood transferred to Hajipur, where I had to take charge immediately after training. On receipt of theseorders I prayed mentally to Baba that I might be kept at one station for some length of time. On being relived from Delhi by the end of August 1957 I reached Hajipur. Up to that stage there was little Ananda Marga pracar work there and I began it. Most of the advocates of Hajipur were either my former schoolmates or college mates and I began discussing Ananda Marga philosophy with them. Although these people did not easily accept Ananda Marga sadhana, I met with some success and many took initiations. After initiation they began to perform sadhana with sincerity. Meanwhile Acarya Deep Narainji and Acarya Kuldiipji also came on transfer to nearby Chak Sikandar and Hajipur. I began to receive cooperation from them also and pracar work proceeded speedily. By now we had our unit in Hajipur and weekly dharmacakra was regular. After some time Acarya Shri Shyam Narainji also came to Sonpur and thus we began pracar work in Sonpur also. After my posting at Hajipur, it appeared that Baba had granted my prayer for stability at one place. By about the end of November 1957, I came to know that Baba was returning by rail from Betia after celebrating Dharma Mahacakra there on the occasion of the full moon night of Agrahana. He was returning via Muzaffarpur, I could not restrain myself and came to Muzaffarpur for Baba’s darshan. The train arrived by eight or nine at Muzaffarpur. All the Margii brothers welcomed Baba with victory to Baba slogans. This was the first occasion I was meting Baba after January 1957. All the Margii brothers of Muzaffarpur were given an opportunity to have Baba darshan and to do sastaunga pranam. Thereafter came the turn of those who had come from outside. I was also one of these. I was able to do my pranam in the train itself. I was overwhelmed at the time of doing the pranam. After inquiring my welfare Baba said, “Nagina seems unhappy with me these days?” I said, “It is not so Baba, where shall I go if I feel unhappy at your feet? I feel, on the other hand, that my Baba is not pleased with me.” When the train departed I began to wonder why Baba spoke to me like this. After some thought I realized that I had not been unable to go to Jamalpur after I left in 1955. Now I began to think constantly about going to Jamalpur. Days rolled on but I could not make a visit to Jamalpur. 1957 was closing and we were planning to celebrate the New Year in 1958, when Baba’s New Year’s message was received. After the celebrations of the New Year’s day, Baba’s message was read out which read like this: “Do not compare life with a stagnant pool. Life is lik had said this toe a torrential stream. Its characteristic duty is to push forward pushing aside the obstacles and calamities on the way like implements of the road. Therefore, those who want to steerclear of difficulties and obstacles have lost the life of life. They are dead. The fit place for them is not society but the burial ground.” Anandamurt i 1-1-1951